Today I want to talk about Nowhere. Nowhere is a regional burn in Spain, set in the desert near Zaragoza. Around 3,500 burners attend this one-week-long event.

I just came back from my first Nowhere, which was also my first burn in Europe. Before the burn, there was a lot of anticipation and curiosity about how it would be. Nowhere is known as a sex-positive burn. I was quite curious about the ‘sex-positive’ aspect, imagining people having sex and orgies everywhere.

Avner and I took our time getting from Portugal to Spain, turning the trip into a road trip adventure. We stopped by a town called Oropesa and Madrid to visit friends and do some last-minute shopping. 

Upon arriving at Nowhere, I was struck by the beautiful landscape of the Monegros Desert. We were immediately greeted by our campmates, learning everyone’s names, getting an orientation, and a tour of the camp. Our camp, Sheepy Ship, had a unique theme, as the name suggests: Sheep and Ship. Our camp members called ourselves sheep and greeted each other with “bahhhh bahhhh.” Our camp featured a sail, a viewing tower, a communal tent called the Lotus Tent, and an octopus art car. We had 36 people in our camp, mostly from Portugal, the Netherlands, and the UK. Thanks to our friends’ connections in Portugal, we got introduced to this camp.

Our Octopus art car created by Jorn @jornvanlieshout

The event itself is a lot smaller compared to the usual Burning Man I’m used to. Because it’s small, it’s very easy to bump into campmates and new friends. There’s a sense of intimacy and coziness that I found refreshing. 

The highlight of my burn was definitely my campmates. I was pleasantly surprised by how amazing everyone in our camp was. It was so easy to strike up a conversation with anyone. I was reminded how important and incredible it is to be in a community with like-minded people, working together, and supporting each other in the harsh desert environment.

Sheepy Ship 2024

The most memorable part of the burn was Friday night. Many people gathered around a nearby mountain to watch the sunset. As the sun dipped below the horizon, we noticed a storm approaching. Lightning lit up the sky, and soon, rain began to pour. Avner and I, along with a few of our campmates, sought shelter and finally settled at a camp next to ours. We spent the night cracking jokes, sharing snacks, and watching the lightning storm – surrendering to the elements of nature while getting cozy in our little bubble.

Sunset at Nowhere

I finally understood what sex positivity means. There are many camps that provide sex-positive spaces and workshops. Normal societal taboos are removed, and people are allowed and invited to explore their sexuality, kinks, fantasies, and more. The sex-positive environment didn’t bother me much. Given the context, it felt normal to walk into a camp and see people openly having sex. Or people sharing about the threesomes they just had or the random sensual experiences they encountered. With an open mind, I found myself listening to these conversations and feeling happy for them having these radical experiences.

A glimpse of the workshops at Nowhere

I didn’t spend much time exploring workshops and orgies. Most of my time was spent at camp connecting with my campmates, getting stuff done around the camp, and cooking dinner for 30+ people. 

I love Nowhere for its strong sense of community and the fact that it’s less effort than Burning Man. It feels like backyard camping compared to the harshness and vastness of Burning Man. 

No Info Booth at Nowhere 2024

For anyone attending Nowhere for the first time, my advice is to keep an open mind, explore the workshops, and take it easy. Embrace the intimacy, the connections, and the unique experiences that Nowhere has to offer.

After the burn, Avner and I took an extended road trip back to Portugal. We visited San Sebastián, Bilbao, Madrid, and Salamanca. It was my first time exploring the northern coast of Spain, and I fell in love with the landscape and the lushness of nature. During the journey, Avner and I had the chance to decompress, talk about our experiences, and reminisce about the new friends we made. We also fell in love with Spain all over again—it’s definitely one of our favorite countries in the world!

Cathedral in Salamanca, Madrid

At the end of February, after spending nearly a month with family in Malaysia, I headed to a solo retreat in Bangkok – something I’d been wanting to do since the start of the year. My goal was simple: to bask in solitude, reflect on the year gone by, and chart my course for 2024.

When I shared my plans with my mom, she said, people go to the mountain in nature for retreats, why do you go to Bangkok? To which I replied, nobody is cooking or bringing me food in the mountains! 

Another thing about this retreat is that I wanted to go somewhere convenient. From my hometown, it’s a 2.5-hour direct flight to Bangkok. In Bangkok, the city offers plenty of convenience, especially Grab Food. I can order pretty much anything I want to eat at any time delivered to my hotel.

Talking about hotel, I stayed at THA City Loft, a place I had stayed before and adored. It’s situated in the Ekkamai area, next to a 24-hour Starbucks. Central World is a 10-minute drive. The room itself is cozy, comfortable, and aesthetically pleasing. 

My retreat was about spending quality time with myself. I established a morning routine that included meditation, yoga, reading, writing, and drawing mandalas. Starting my day with this routine put me in the right frame of mind to make the most of my time. 

The day after I arrived, I walked to a flower shop nearby and was eager to treat myself to something special. I browsed through their catalog and discussed my preferences with the shop lady. She customized a bouquet for me that I absolutely loved. I brought this bouquet back to my hotel and it instantly added an extra touch of coziness to my space and elevated the vibe of my retreat.

I treated myself like it was my birthday week. Shopping for new clothes, shoes, bag, gifts for friends, indulging in the food I love – especially my favorite sushi and sashimi, trying a face massage for the first time (which became my favorite type of massage), and enjoying a manicure that made me feel so pretty.

I am so grateful that I could afford to pamper myself for a week. 

(Cue Miley Cyrus’s song – Flowers) I don’t have to wait for somebody else to treat me nicely. Me myself can do that and do it well. The feeling of being taken good care of by myself is empowering, it’s sweet, it’s something I love doing and appreciate.

Other than the enjoyment of the modern world, the other main purpose was to reflect and plan. Using the Year Compass format, I revisited the events of 2023, reflecting on accomplishments and challenges, and setting intentions for 2024. These exercises helped me navigate through the past year while focusing on my vision for the year ahead.

After 6 days of rejuvenation, I packed up my suitcase again and headed to the next country to meet up with my sister, niece and nephew. A trip that I’ve been looking forward to doing!

A few weeks ago, Avner and I went to Boom Festival. This is a festival that I’d been wanting to check out for many years. Now, we live only 30 minutes away from it.

Leading up to the festival, Avner and I didn’t particularly feel excited about it. After attending many Burning Man events, festivals just don’t excite us so much anymore. But since it’s right next to us, we knew we had to check it out. 

The 7-Day Boom Festival happens in the city of Idanha-A-Nova in central Portugal. The land of Boom is massive! There’s a big lake in the middle of it. The event is very well-organized. There are different types of camping areas, stages, and zones. Their cashless system works wonders. We can pay for stuff using our wristband and top-ups are easy and fast. There are tons of food vendors selling food from many countries and even a supermarket! Oh, and their compost toilets are the cleanest toilets I’ve ever seen at an outdoor event! Well done Boom! 👏

The theme of the festival this year is Radical Love and it could definitely be felt throughout the festival. 40,000 people from 169 countries got together to experience the power of community. I could see people from all walks of life. From psytrance lovers to tantra hippies to 3-generation Portuguese families, no matter how we looked or where we came from, everyone treated each other with respect and love. I’ve never felt so much harmony within such a big diverse group of people. 

The first 3 days of the festival, Avner and I were mostly on our own. We would go to the beach, dip in the lake, enjoy fruit cups and acai ice cream. We would walk around the venue and marvel at the art, gardens, and the infrastructure Boom has built in the last 20 years. We were truly impressed by what they are creating. We took many pictures and got a lot of inspiration for our land. 

On the 4th day, we met up with my friend Scott and he introduced us to his group of friends. From here, our festival took a turn! Luckily, we clicked instantly with everyone in the group. Most of them knew each other from Shang Hai and 3 of them also lived on Koh Phangan (small world!). It was refreshing to feel like we belonged to a big family. We saw each other every day after. It’s crazy how fast people can bond and feel like we’ve known each other forever. We danced, we chilled, we talked, and got to know each other. It truly felt like a family. We were so happy to have met this amazing group of people!

After the festival ended, some of them came to visit our land and we spent a few days together visiting places around. Avner and I still couldn’t stop talking about how grateful we are to have met them and know that we will be friends for a long time. We are already planning our next adventures together and still texting each other often. 

I titled this blog “The Power of People” because the experiences I mentioned above wouldn’t have that much impact without the people. People make the place. It’s the people we connect with on our journey that leaves forever memories in our heart. When people come together to form a family or a community, we do things for each other, we share what we have, we think and care for one another – these are the things that matter the most in lives, or at least in my life. I always feel a tremendous energy and like a dormant power inside me awakens whenever I get to contribute, share, and mingle with the people around me. In times like this, I feel truly alive and blessed!

In the past two days, there have been a lot of posts on my newsfeed about the passing of my childhood idol Coco Lee. Coco Lee was a singer, dancer, and the first Chinese who performed at Oscar. She was famous for her work in the movie Mulan. I grew up listening to her music, as do a lot of my friends around my age. 

The cause of her death was suicide. Another celebrity suicide. She had a successful, glamorous career. She was married to a Canadian billionaire (Her wedding was reported to have cost 20 million dollars!). She lived the life of a dream of many people. So did a lot of the celebrities who committed suicide. Yet, they left this world the way they did. 

Many of them suffered from depression which has contributed to their cause of suicide. 20% of adults in America currently live with mental illness. There have been many discussions about mental health in recent years. 

Personally, I struggle with depression many times in my life too. 

A few years ago, I read a book called “The Road Less Traveled” by Scott Peck – a psychologist who specializes in psychotherapy. In the book, the author talks about a new perspective to look at depression. 

He says depression is not a mental illness. It is a normal and basically healthy phenomenon. He describes depression as a lobster shedding shell. As the lobster outgrows its own body, it inevitably experiences pain. Depression is a natural part of growth. “It becomes abnormal or unhealthy only when something interferes with the giving-up process, with the result that the depression is prolonged and cannot be resolved by completion of the process.” – Scott Peck

If we view depression from this perspective, it could be seen as a phase or transition to the next stage in life. Depression doesn’t last forever. Many who chose to take their own lives couldn’t live through the process, to the other side of the tunnel.

This could lead to another discussion about self-love. In the same book, the author discusses self-love as not the love we give to ourselves but the love that we receive from other people. That points out how important it is for us to be connected to other people. More than that, how important it is for us to receive love and care from other people. 

Letting people know we care about their well-being and their importance in life and at the same time, letting others know when we need their love and care could be the antidote to the problem. I wish for a world where we don’t feel embarrassed to ask for help and at the same time do not hold back to express our love. Everyone is fighting a battle we don’t know about. 

With that being said, let’s call somebody we love and show them that we care, shall we?

Since I am always away from my family, I make an effort to always come home for Chinese New Year. Last year was probably the only year I missed in a very long time. This year, I am happy to join my family again for the biggest day on the Chinese calendar. 

This year definitely feels different. Because of covid, everything seems quiet. Visiting friends and family is usually a big part of Chinese New Year. But this year, due to obvious reasons, people are not encouraged to visit others. The only home I visited was my grandma’s house, where I only stayed for 10 minutes. 

New Year’s eve dinner, also called ‘reunion dinner’ is usually eating hotpot at home. It’s called reunion dinner because it’s the time people travel back to their home town to visit families. I love eating hotpot at home on new year’s eve, watching tv, waiting for fo the countdown. But this year, to save time and hassle, my family decided to eat out at a Korean restaurant. It was not as eventful but having a nice dinner together is all it matters.

Another important Chinese tradition is the giving and receiving of red envelopes (aka angpao). People put cash money in red envelopes and give them away. It’s a lot simpler than buying and giving gifts. The rule is once you are married, you have to give angpaos to people younger than you or who are not married. If you are not married (like me), you get to receive angpaos from people who are married. Not a bad thing for not being married! It still amuses me that my married younger sister needs to give me angpao every year. And though I don’t need to, I enjoy giving angpaos to my family, especially a big one to my mom. 

Last year, I had the worst financial year of my adult life. Fortunately, I ended the year with some money in the bank and I am so happy to be able to give it away to my family this year. I’ve never been so happy giving my money away! A big purpose of my goal of making money is to give to my family. To be able to make money and give it to my family gives me so much fulfillment. They give me the fuel and motivation to do good things and make good money. 

Chinese New Year has come to an end which is also the time I plan for my next travel. Saying bye to family is not always easy especially at times like this. As much as I love traveling, I also know the importance of spending time with my family. I sure hope Malaysia will ease travel restrictions soon so I get to come back whenever I want without going through quarantine and covid tests. The time I am spending in Malaysia this year has been very quiet and I’ve got a lot of time to rest and recharge. I thank my family for taking care of me as always. Without their support, I would not be able to fly the way I do. Now I am ready to spread my wings and venture out into the world again. See you at my next stop!